Societies all over the world strive under the weight of moral corruption and can hardly survive the consequences of their unnatural choices. In Africa, many men who willfully engage in polygamy are usually financially stable. Assalmu alaikum. Depending on your preferences, this can mean that you only have two spouses or even numerous different spouses at the same time.The exact number is up to you and to your individual preferences. Its well known that polygamy in Islam is one of the most controversial issues that spark from time to time in Islamic societies because most people dont know what is meant by polygamy from an Islamic perspective. Plural Marriage in Islam (This is a section taken from an article of Shaikh Al-Fawzn elsewhere on this site). As for the ancient patriarchs, for example, King Solomon had 700 wives and also 300 concubines. Lets talk about the rarer polyandry first. In polygamy, the husband dominates or rules over his wives and children. Thus, depending on the respective region, it can also make quite a lot of sense to live a polygamous lifestyle in order to increase social status and the overall level of acceptance in society. Your kids might have a hard time understanding why his or her family is different from other families. The bottom line is, maintaining the marriage no longer rests on two persons only since there are more people in the polygamy marriage setting. (2003): A recent shift from polygyny to monogamy in humans is suggested by the analysis of worldwide Y-chromosome diversity. If you have more than one marriage partner, you can easily choose who to be with at a particular time. Jealousy and favoritism is a big issue . By sticking with the same female, a male is able to ensure that the females offspring are also his, and prevent this offspring from being killed by male rivals intent on returning the female to fertility (breastfeeding being a natural contraceptive). And We are ever, of all things, Knowing. Quraan 21:81, And We had certainly given to David and Solomon knowledge, and they said, Praise [is due] to Allah , who has favored us over many of His believing servants. Quraan 27:15, Said one who had knowledge from the Scripture, I will bring it (the throne of the Queen of Sheba) to you before your glance returns to you. And when Solomonsaw it placed before him, he said, This is from the favor of my Lord to test me whether I will be grateful or ungrateful. And we revealed to Abraham, Ishmael, Isaac, Jacob, the Descendants, Jesus, Job, Jonah, Aaron, and Solomon, and to David We gave the book of Psalms. Quraan 4:163, And Noah, We guided before; and among his descendants, David and Solomonand Job and Joseph and Moses and Aaron. In an Islamic polygynous marriage, a women is provided for, honoured, shielded from harm, sheltered, her children are considered legitimate and given full rights of kinship, lineage and inheritance she and her children are fully fledged equal members of the family. Polygamy has many disadvantages, according to this post. The glory of his prosperity is stained by Gods displeasure against him and the fruits of that displeasure. It is known that the numbers can only be increased through marriage, and the number of offspring gained through plural marriage will be greater than that achieved through marriage to one wife. But make no mistake, humans are still driven with the desire to enjoy multiple partners even outside their marriage. In many cases, the women are not in the position to work, school, or improve themselves as their improvement may make them feel they no longer need someone. This resulted in a very civilized relationship between husband and wife in Islam. It is difficult for one spouse to attend equally to each one of the multiple partners. As a woman, you naturally have a limited number of children you can give birth to in one lifetime. Polygamy can make the husband take the spouse for granted, 22. This is an advantage of extended type of family because this family contains more people to serve as resources during crisis and provides more role models for behavior of values. Some people also fear the financial consequences of divorce and therefore stay married to their partners. 11So the Lord said to Solomon, Since this is your attitude and you have not kept my covenant and my decrees, which I commanded you, I will most certainly tear the kingdom away from you and give it to one of your subordinates. Plural marriage helps to increase the numbers of the ummah (nation, Muslim community). Genital malignancies especially cancer cervix is directly related to women having multiple sexual partners. . Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. The diversity of the gene pool. . Overall, the infant mortality in polygynous families is considerably higher than in monogamous families. The Prophets of God (may Gods peace be upon all of them) would marry numerous wives and engage in polygamy. In others, such as Russia and South Africa, it is illegal but not criminalized. Just as many cultural practices, polygamy promotes and exhibits cultures of a location or area. More connections: You cant compare the connection of a man with 5 wives and 15 educated and working children to a man with 1 wife and 3 children, the former will definitely be more richer and connected than the latter. According to genetic studies, it is only relatively recently, about 10,000 years ago, that monogamy began to prevail over polygamy in human populations. Having Varieties: when there is multiple partners you have different varieties. 5. With monogamy, a man with an excellent gene, for example, a genius gene, may never pass that gene to his progeny since the number of children in monogamous settings is usually few. People go into polygamous marriages for different reasons: pressure from parents to get married, forced/arranged marriages, desperation to leave spinsterhood, etc. Monogamy is by far the norm in Muslim societies, as most men cannot afford to maintain more than one family, and many of those who could would rather not. While the pros can make it initially attractive for men and women alike, the disadvantages and the nature of humans will likely make it unsustainable. He is not called to account, and hides his mistress from his wife, his mother and family. According to Islam, are Muslim men allowed to keep all four wives in one house? Does a Dog's Head Shape Predict How Smart It Is? Because there will be competition among the wives to please him, he probably won't care that much if any of his wives threaten to leave or throw tantrums for attention. It gets worse if you all live under one roof. Furthermore, polygamy helps in the expansion of man's gene pool, the reduction of boredom, and offers the excitement that comes with being sexually active with multiple women yet, technically, not hurt their feelings. In your opinion, what are the advantages and disadvantages of polygamous marriages? Another survey shows that adultery is as common among Christians as non-Christians. In fact, if you are in a polygamous marriage, you can have multiple partners at the same time without being accused of cheating. Even if a woman is working hard and being the best she can be for her husband, she may end up helping herself in a way. Polygamy is tolerated by the Koran--although it should be recognized that, like the principle of Whether it's a one-man/multiple women relationship, polyandry, or group marriage, one of the benefits of polygamy (when looking at the pros and cons of the practice), is the low risk of getting bored. 10Although he had forbidden Solomon to follow other gods, Solomon did not keep the Lords command. Tensions may be reduced by establishing a clear hierarchy among the co-wives, or if the co-wives are sisters (sororal polygyny), or if they each keep a separate household (hut polygyny). There are no advantages or disadvantages to polyamory. In some societies, a man may have multiple wives in order to provide for each of their needs and the needs of their children. Your points are quite good. Polygamy undoubtedly has many pros, but the cons aren't pretty. Yes, the idea of large families can be beneficial to kids in certain ways; however, it can also be confusing. This is not the case in reality at all! Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Furthermore, it could mean negative financial consequences for her and her children, especially in cases of separation. (This is a section taken from an article of Shaikh Al-Fawznelsewhere on this site). The benefits of polygamy are numerous both for the husband and hiswives and these benefits are not concealed from the person who has true insight, because if a man was restricted to just one woman whilst there are numerouswomen in a society, then many woman will be deprived of husbands. However, cultural or religious traditions made him bring in subsequent wives in a non-formal or non-legal way. Receive weekly tips & tricks to improve your love life. On the contrary, Islam has some reasons why it allows polygamy, such as assert woman's rights, her right for married, make a family, have and raise their children. A big family has its advantages. Older women (usually post-30s), divorcees (or widows) [read on], In the name of Allah, Most Merciful, Bestower of Mercy. 5 He followed Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and Molek the detestable god of the Ammonites. And in all make sure your happiness is your priority. To conclude, clean, pure and pious living cannot be realized by human endeavor alone, since humans do not have the ultimate knowledge that ensures their own welfare. So when Islamic legislation handled polygamy issues, Islamic legislation permitted only polygyny without permitting polyandry, so the following question will appear. It is unfortunate that promiscuoussexual behaviour andinfidelity havebecome normal practices in many societies whilst plural Islamic marriage for men is outlawed, seen as barbaric and demeaning to women. Altogether, it's an easy situation to avoid by not going into polygamy in the first place. Third theme: The coping strategies used by polygamous women have included faith in religion, fate role, and compromise When parting with one, there are still others. Upon the sending of the Prophet Muhammad, men were restricted in the number of wives to four. And in reality, in this there is a greater benefit for women than there is for men. As-salmu-alaikum-wa-rahmatullh Well try and fix it insh-Allh. If what comes to mind when you hear polygamy is a marital arrangement of one guy with more than one wife, you are not wrong. | Its the only accepted form of polygamy. 3. In turn, this will imply an additional financial burden on you and you should make sure that you can afford having multiple partners in order to protect yourself from any financial difficulties related to your polygamous lifestyle. People marry for companionship, start a family, financial support, pressure from parents, etc. In times of war, with high male absenteeism and mortality, polygyny supports population growth and replenishment by ensuring that every female can find a mate. What is the "JUSTICE" in this regard. His many children supply him with a ready source of labour, and the means, through arranged marriages, to create multiple, reliable, and durable social, economic, and political alliances. Islamic literature completely contradicts this denigrating account of the Prophet Solomon (Sulaymaan). However, if there are too many children in a household, chances are that some of those children will suffer from serious neglect. 2 They were from nations about which the Lord had told the Israelites, You must not intermarry with them, because they will surely turn your hearts after their gods. Nevertheless, Solomon held fast to them in love. Research from the United Nations shows that women in such marriages/families are prone to serious emotional abuse. Another problem with polygamy is that you will also need a bigger home in order to accommodate all of your spouses. Looking through these pros and cons, you'll undoubtedly find many undesirable cons, but you can't ignore this upside as a woman. Recommended: Advantages and Disadvantages of an Extended Family. Now, a setting with more than one wife, and perhaps, many children will naturally be prone to more arguments or discords. Even so, there are many instances of polygamy in the West, especially within immigrant communities and certain religious groups such as the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (FLDS Church) and other Mormon fundamentalists. In the Gallic War, Julius Csar claimed that, among ancient Britons, ten and even twelve men have wives in common, particularly brothers, or fathers and sonswhich to me sounds more like group marriage than polyandry proper. Polygamy is a breeding ground for jealousy, 21. In turn, other men often want to be like this guy and the men that have multiple wives will often be the most respected men in those societies. As for a man, then his desires do not fade away and his sexual strength and preparedness for women remains into old age. Now, I'm not trying to use this point to justify adultery or promote polygamy, but let's face it, the alarming rate of divorce proves that the soulmate ideology is laughable. By nature, polygamy encourages gender inequality, which often leads to trampling upon the rights of the women in the marriage. In fact, many couples in therapy revealed that sex was the only glue that held their marriage for many years when there was no longer time to engage in other things that strengthen relationships. The bottom line is, men sneak around because they are not permitted to have multiple wives. Altogether, these can promote jealousy among wives and even children, thereby creating enemies and unnecessary commotion in families. Historically, most cultures that permitted polygamy permitted polygyny (a man taking two or more wives) rather than polyandry (a woman taking two or more husbands). From an Islamic point of view, there are two main benefits and advantages of polygamy: So, we discussed the importance and effect of polygamy on Islamic society, and the husbands who are willing to apply polygamy must stick to the following conditions. Advantages and Disadvantages of an Extended Family, Countries that produces the best music in the world, Countries With the Most Handsome Men in the World 2022. Monogamous unions may have developed in tandem with sedentary agriculture, helping to maintain land and property within the same narrow kin group. As the Quran indicates (4:3), the issue of polygamy in Islam is understood in the light of community obligations towards orphans and widows. What's more, when there are scenarios of financial challenges, the polygamy-established home may be relatively harder to manage since there's more financial obligation. There are numerous advantages and disadvantages of polygamy. So women are left behind, single and no longer married. In such scenarios, polygamy can be a lifesaver. . The men enjoy having multiple options, and the wives enjoy financial support and a family relationship that comes from being married. Furthermore, because cheating is common to both men and women, the presence of one or more members engaging in sex outside the arrangement can lead to infecting everyone. 1 King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women besides Pharaohs daughterMoabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians and Hittites. If a woman doesn't want children at all and doesn't want to force her decision on her spouse, the pros and cons of polygamy can present a win-win situation to the marriage. So plural marriage alleviates this difficulty in society without doubt. This hadeeth proves that Allaah did not rebuke him for his wives. Position One: Islam restricts or forbids polygyny. First and foremost, polygyny sanctions and perpetuates gender inequality, with co-wives officially and patently subordinated to their husband. Louis XIV of France, the Sun King, had a great number of mistresses, both official and unofficial. justice and ability, many husbands will turn the advantages of polygamy into a bundle of disadvantages, because the concept of polygamy in Islam is based on solving societys problems. Dupanloup I et al. Polygamy can encourage hard work and healthy competition, 16. This can provide security and stability for the wives and their children. Those whospeak ill of plural marriages (polygyny) are affected by the modern day Christian ideology (which itself is not the way of the Prophets as mentioned in biblical scriptures). The advantages and disadvantages vary, but the overall advantage common to all of them is: allowing consenting adults to have the relationships they want. 128 AH) and the Philosophers. 2. Presently, it is not a common practice in Islamic communities for a lot of reasons; e.g. As for the one who is not able to maintain the required justice then he is prohibited from plural marriage so that he is prevented from oppression, transgression and tyranny. Hence, in case you aspire to such a lifestyle, you may have to keep it secret and discrete instead of bragging about it in front of your friends. And if you (pl) fear you cannot be just towards the orphans, then marry the women you liketwo or three or fourbut if you fear you will not be equitable, then(only) one1 or(consider) those whom you rightfully possess.. Now add cases of manipulation to get the guy's attention and other misunderstandings, then what you'll have is a recipe for regular "royal rumble.". 11 Tips for Dating a Blind Person, Challenges and Dating Websites, Do Emotionally Unavailable Men Change? Benefits and Advantages of polygamy in Islam From an Islamic point of view, there are two main benefits and advantages of polygamy: Plural marriage helps to increase the numbers of the ummah (nation, Muslim community). Essay on polygamy is better than monogamy. II. Sulaiman did not disbelieve, but it was thedevils who disbelieved Quraan 2:102, Indeed, We have revealed to you, [O Muhammad], as We revealed to Noah and the prophets after him. Shall Solomon fall, that was the beauty of Israel, and so great a blessing of his generation? Your email address will not be published. There was no king like Solomon who was beloved of his God, yet even him did outlandish women cause to sin. People who have multiple partners have a lower incentive to cheat on their partners. Moreover, Islam does not encourage men to remarry to appease their concupiscence and to sacrifice familial love and peace for evanescent pleasure. The women's ways of coping included the use of religion, faith and a strong sisterly bond formed with the co-wives. In Arab counties, polygamy is allowed on the condition that the man can treat and love his wives equally. If you are the type that wants a man that'll go out of his way to please you, then think again. Sex keeps relationships together. 2.0 / 5 based on 4 ratings. While both men and women can enjoy some benefits in a polygamy marriage, the one-man-multiple wives type marriage favors men more. Any children born from an adulterous relationship are quite often shunned having no rights. Lets illustrate the definition of polygamy and define the meaning of Polygamy from an Islamic perspective. I. In this audio lesson, the pros and cons of polygamy are discussed.https://enviro. Power Struggle. Islamic polygamy addresses the social problems of prostitution and extramarital . 7On a hill east of Jerusalem, Solomon built a high place for Chemosh the detestable god of Moab, and for Molek the detestable god of the Ammonites.8He did the same for all his foreign wives, who burned incense and offered sacrifices to their gods. If Allah wills) he would have begotten children who would have fought in GodsCause., Shuaib and Ibn Abi Az-Zinad said, Ninety women is more correct (than seventy). Reported Sahih al-Bukhari 3424. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, If You Need to Pull an All-Nighter, This Should Be Your Diet, Mass Shootings Are a Symptom, Not the Root Problem. So during those times a man is deprived from intimatemarital relations if he only has one wife, especially if he is young and has strong desires. If a man transgresses against any of his wives then he is reprimandedfor his transgressions. 1. 4 Reasons Why Ramadan Is A Point Of Change, What is Ramadan? However, in certain situations, a man is allowed to marry more than one wife. However, these options aren't easy for women in many locations of the world like Africa. Saira Khan So, instead of waiting for a single guy that may never come, settling to be a man's second or third wife might not be such a bad idea. Guess what? Going through the pros and cons, the benefits are undeniable. A woman is in need of being lookedafter (and in need of companionship) and having someone over her in authority, and taking care of her. Consequently, people who live in regions where religious beliefs are quite important may also have a quite hard time living a polygamous lifestyle since they may get socially excluded by the local population due to that. Unhappiness and Childs neglect: Polygamous marriage can also lead to a state where spouses get stuck in unhappy marriages. If you are looking at the pros and cons of polygamy for yourself or a friend, remember kids are fragile, and polygamy isn't as common as monogamy anymore. Even in this modern age, where gender inequality is being frowned upon, many domestic chores are still classified as feminine things. Keeping more than one wife and having more than one child will naturally increase such a home's budget. Celibacy doesn't necessarily have to mean being alone, miserable, and without any male companion. This condition will translate to a serious financial disadvantage for the woman and her kids. The United Nations recommends that the union be completely prohibited or discouraged. Fragile-States Index 2017. See my related article, Polyamory: A New Way of Loving. Without applying the two conditions of polygamy; i.e. Naturally, humans are a variety-loving species, which makes cheating on our spouses an easy option as continuous monotony is a problem for us. 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